Why I Surrender

My heart has felt the icy edge of heartbreak many, many times.

Sometimes I’ve wondered why I would ever try to love again. Fortunately, these days, that is usually a fleeting thought, because I know that my truth is that I want love. Our truth as humans is that we all want and need love, so why would any of us give up on trying for a fundamental need and right? 

But then there’s this thing called vulnerability, aka fear.  

It always gets in the way of progress…  possibility…growth…love. It’s that necessary, but oh-so-fragile part of us that wants to hide and protect ourselves from any risk of exposure, hurt, or heartbreak. 

I used to let my fear of vulnerability keep me in hiding. I’d remain in complete control of myself with a lover, just to be sure I wouldn’t let too much out. I feared, that if I did, that small, inadequate part of me would be rejected, and that rejection had a nasty habit of defining my worth. That’s not my story anymore, nor should it be yours. 

This is the thing…Our hearts are not made of glass, only to be shattered into irreparable pieces in a heartbroken moment.

Our hearts are muscles. 

The heart expands with every moment of love and acceptance, and it contracts when it’s bruised with hurt. But it is never truly broken. It becomes stronger every time we allow ourselves to surrender, and push it wide open to its expansive edges. 

We can accept the risk of heartbreak when we know that our hearts become stronger every time we allow it to open…the heavier the weight, the stronger the muscle.  

When you surrender to the risk of heartbreak again and again, you choose love over fear. Living a life fueled by love allows for a feeling of freedom, unlike a life dictated by fear.

Fear shrinks you. Love expands you. 

You cannot be broken. You may be bruised, or strained, but never broken. Better yet, you may find yourself surrounded by love, and surrender is the only way there.

This time around, do this: Open. Trust. Expand. Surrender.