Welcome to Authentic Dating...
I am Chelli Pumphrey. I am a therapist and life coach who has been helping people find love in their lives for over 20 years. I created this program because I realized two essential truths in my work with people over the years: most human beings have a deep desire to be loved, and most human beings fear that they are not lovable, worthy of love, or able to be loved. I wanted to help people bridge this gap by helping them get clear that they are worth loving, and that love is possible.
Authentic Dating is...
...a relationship coaching program that will help you successfully navigate dating and relationships. You will get clear on who you need to date and why, and how this whole relationship thing works!
...a method to the madness of dating. Authentic Dating means being brave enough to be yourself when it comes to dating and building relationships. It means showing up in real, meaningful ways so that you can be seen for you who really are... And loved for who you really are. And when you find someone who loves you for who you are... you find relationships that last. You find relationships that are fulfilling. You find faith in love.
AUTHENTIC DATING TEACHES YOU HOW TO KEEP YOUR MIND CALM AND YOUR HEART STRONG.
There are many coaches, self-help books, classes, and dating resources that will tell you how to make someone chase you, or magically fall in love with you. Don't be fooled! These techniques fall short. I call this "chameleon dating advice". They teach you how to do everything but be yourself! They may provide some short-term dating success, but, to find true change and fulfillment in your love life, you need to learn about two crucial things. SCIENCE AND LOVE. Science? really?
In Authentic Dating, I teach you the science behind relationships and human behavior. This is not rocket science....I promise! The truth is, most of our dating practices and relationships are based on some very clear, scientific models of human behavior. As human beings, we are wired to attach to others. Our bodies and our brains are constantly working to figure out how to connect us to others (even when the other person may not be a good fit for us). Sometimes this wiring can make us do crazy things in relationships, or spend hours worrying about relationships, or completely fearing them!
Why is this science important to know when you're dating?
Because when you understand how your body and brain are responding to love, you can be more in control of the dating process. You can manage the biological impulses that make us crazy for someone who may not be worth getting crazy over.
You become the "chooser," instead of the chosen. You step into your power.
Authentic Dating is also about this crazy little thing called "love"... It is about learning the necessary but sometimes difficult art of self-love, because...
Dating advice should never be about changing who you are to make someone love you. It is about loving you so that you are comfortable allowing someone else to love you - the real, authentic you.
If you are hiding your true self, you will feel like a "fake", and pretend to be someone you're not. Eventually the relationship falls apart because you finally have no choice but to show the "real you". Pretending has a way of eating away at the core of your being. It creates wounds that run deep.
Being authentic means loving who you are, and presenting who you truly are to the world... in all of your glorious, beautiful, perfect imperfection. Authentic Dating means building the confidence to shine in your glorious, beautiful, imperfect perfection, and trusting that the partner of your dreams will see you, and love you, and will also be brave enough to show up in his or her glorious beautiful, perfect imperfection. Oh, to be loved in such a way!